Tu Lan

6th and Mission, one of the worst blocks in the city. Dude burning up rocks at 11am while some lost tourist stares in pure shock. I’ve seen a broke ass pimp get stabbed on the corner. It’s just mainey as fuck and the city hasn’t been able to really do shit about it. The best thing about that block though is motherfucking Tu Lan.

Easily the best hole in the wall Vietnamese joint in San Francisco. They have a health department score of like 92. Must have been a good day because the place is a fucking dump. At lunch you’re fucked trying to get a seat. But it’s cheap as fuck and goddamn is the food awesome. They have never done me wrong. I went there for breakfast at 4 in the afternoon on saturday and hollered at some pork shish kebab and rice noodles. I’m trying to be healthy or something right now. Their crispy noodles are on some next shit too.

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Chili Cheese Dog Sandwich

On Friday I went to JB’s Place over in Potrero Hill. The menu said they made a chili cheese dog sandwich so I ate it. I tried to pick it up but that didn’t work out too well. Only thing about it that kind of sucked was the bread was tuff to eat after it got soggy. That shit needs to be a soft roll because ripping apart a sandwich full of chili cheese gets messy as fuck.

Saturday I went to Los Jarritos and ate some chilaquiles. They were really good. First time I’d been to this spot for breakfast but they were doing it hella proper. Chilaquiles are pretty much the best thing you can eat for breakfast. The best way to describe them is to think of breakfast nachos with eggs, sometimes meat. They are kind of like Migas but not really. Either way if you don’t know then get learned because they are the truth.

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Torta Cubana

For lunch I decided to finally stop by this Taco Truck over in Potrero Hill. I’d seen it but the name threw me off, Liz & Gaby. I just imagined some old lesbian couple running the shit, I’m talking like grey haired buzz cuts, wear crocs, and ride harleys. You know, Liz and Gaby, after their trip to mexico where they bought wooden dolls and went on hikes for a Teva experience. Well they decided to open their own taco truck. Problem is they can’t cook, so inside of the truck we have to latino dudes and no old lesbian couples to be found.

Anyways, moving along I rolled up expecting to grab some tacos and then I saw the menu and they had a “Cubana Torta.” This fucking thing had milanese, ham, and sausage. Three kinds of meat? Oh man I debated cause it was lunch and I had to go back to work. I said fuck it and ordered it. Few minutes later a fucking massive block of tinfoil showed up in the plexiglass window.

Now as can be seen here things are not as the menu described. The “sausage” was just some fucking hot dogs cut up. I thought I was getting a pressed torta, hence the whole cuban torta flip. Turns out that was just a reason for them to put some fried ham up in there. Then there is the breaded beef, the milanese, that shit could have benefited from some fucking small attempt at seasoning. The sandwich was goddamn massive though. That photo was taken at the half way point, which at that point is about as big as a regular torta anywhere else. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to go to war with a torta at lunch but I figured fuck it, I’m not loosing to some fucking hot dogs just cause it’s noon on a wednesday.

It was an interesting torta, probably could have benefited from some salsa. I think if the milanese was better and this thing had some real sausage it could be pretty fucking bad ass. The ham was kind of useless in there. I’m not a fan of big sliced tomatoes in tortas, fucking dice that shit. Tortas get mushy and sliced tomatoes are like slip n slides to the beans and bread.

If you want a brick of mediocre sandwich holler at Liz & Gaby, they got bland and big on lock at 18th and Carolina.

Official Summer Eats: Crabfeast

Official Summer Eats: Crabfeast

The sodium content of my body is finally returning to normal after yesterday’s crabfeast.

You know it’s summer when you sit for 3-4 hours picking through crabs like a vulture. There’s something really amazing about sitting down with a group of friends and sharing a few dozen crabs and beers. Eating with your hands, the heat, the newspaper, it’s all very basic and primal. It’s funny to see the different methods everyone uses to extract the meat – everyone has a different style, a story about where they learned to pick crabs. For me, it’s one of the better food experiences out there.

Yesterday we hit up Bethesda Crab House – $35 all you can eat – about 10 minutes north of DC. Everyone was pretty pie eyed from the Dirty Bombs vs. Philadelphyinz party the night before and there might be no better cure for a hangover then more beer – especially when paired with crabs. Old Bay has some magical powers, after about 2 crabs I was feeling like a champion. After about 12 my lips were puckered, my hands were pruned and cut, but I was still going strong.

Shouts to Meistro, DeepSang, and crew for the great idea. If you make it to the DC/Baltimore area during the summer you have to check out a crab house especially if you’ve never been… Just don’t eat the lungs.

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Bacon is the Arthur Herbert Fonzarelli of the Meat World

bacon just might be the all-over-print of the meat world
By mattbrains

Bacon is Dead! Long Live Bacon! – Peter Meehan, Salon.com

This is a great article from Peter Meehan on Salon.com today. I must admit, I hardly ever touch the stuff anymore.

My love of bacon used to be a hedonistic escape from the mundane. Paired with peanutbutter, infused in vodka, wrapped around apples and sausage. It was a true escape, a godsend, reserved for the weekends. It allowed me to leave my suit and tie world and just cool out.

Now, bacon is so chic… so played. I’d hate to say it, but bacon just might be the all-over-print of the meat world. Don’t get me wrong, most streetwear when worn tastefully, in moderation, and innovative ways is stylish and works. Unfortunately, after reading Meehan’s article I’m begining to believe that bacon is heading for an unavoidable trainwreck.

ugh